That Sums It Up

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Mile High Manning

Jesus Goes to New York

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The Cancellation of "SAINTS!"

Tim Tebow is a Jet

The Denver Broncos have reportedly traded Jesus to the New York Jets in the advent of Monday's signing of Peyton Manning. This is of little concern to me, but Denver now has a REAL quarterback, and New York now has two mediocre pieces of shit and religion. Will Jesus take the Jets to the Super Bowl? Probably not. Will he dethrone Mark Sanchez? Probably not. Will the world finally see the end of Tebowing? I fucking hope so.

Free Agency: Day One

Perhaps the biggest move that happened on the opening day of free agency was the San Francisco 49ers' signing of 15-year veteran wide receiver Randy Moss. Well, until the Miami Dolphins decided to trade away Brandon Marshall to the Chicago Bears for two third-round picks (2012 and 2013). Two third-round picks? For Brandon Marshall? Miami, is your executive office a bunch of fucktards? Also, Pierre Garcon has apparently signed with the Washington Redskins, but no one cares.

That is pretty much the only actual news in terms of contracts being inked.

Randy Moss Signs with Niners

Randy Moss elected to sign with the San Francisco 49ers Monday, just hours after working out with them. This looks to be a low-risk, big-gain acquisition for the Niners, whose receivers were completely shut down in the NFC Championship in January. Granted, Braylon Edwards was supposed to be the same thing LAST season, but Edwards has never really had a good season, what, being in Cleveland most of the time. No, the Niners hope Moss plays like he did in 2009, a year before his rocky three-team 2010 season. Thoughts?

NFL Draft Preview - RBs

It's been a couple days since I last posted, but here I am now, live from Cincinnati!

The other day, I took a look at this year's crop of QBs who probably won't amount to shit. Now we get into the players that actually contribute to a team: running backs.

Trent Richardson - Alabama
Trent Richardson is an absolute beast of a ballcarrier. Standing in at 5'11" and 224 lbs, he has a low center of gravity which makes him a tough man to tackle. His speed is usually in the 4.50 range, but he has been clocked at 4.42, and he has impressive breakaway speed. This means that the secondary had better just get out of his way when he's charging. He didn't run at the Combine, due to a minor knee surgery. In his three years with the Tide, he rushed for 3130 yards on 540 carries (5.7 avg) and rolled for 35 touchdowns. Bear in mind that his first two years were spent behind Mark Ingram. If he doesn't go in the top 10, someone is dumb as fuck.

Doug Martin - Boise State

At 5'9" and 219 lbs, we have another running back who is built like a short brick shithouse. Martin, unlike Richardson, is more of an elusive back than a truck, but that doesn't mean he can't lay the hurt on some unwary defender. The man has a nose for the endzone, recording at least 12 touchdowns in three straight seasons, which leads me to wonder if he will be the one to show us how to Dougie. He would be most effective in a dual-back system, alongside a power back. Tampa Bay and Buffalo would be good a good fit for Martin and his skill set.

David Wilson - Virginia Tech

David Wilson's draft stock has him shooting up from being a third-round selection to a late first-round early second-rounder. He is a smaller back, at 5'10" and 209 lbs, so he's not going to be an every-down type of back. His speed (his lowest 40 was 4.32) will draw interest from teams with power feature backs who are looking for a change of pace back or a third down back. His hands are exemplary for a running back, averaging just under 10 yards per catch the past two seasons.

Lamar Miller - Miami

A running back from the U. Go figure! What? A running back from the U who hasn't been riddled with injuries you say? Odd. Lamar Miller is a fairly decent-sized back, standing in a 5'11" and 212 lbs,  and has amazing speed for someone that size. The downside to him is his lack of power and experience (he only played two seasons at Miami) . He should go in the mid-late first round, or the early second. 

Isaiah Pead - Cincinnati 

I'll be honest, until I started this, I had never heard of Isaiah Pead. In fact, I don't think I would have ever heard of him until the draft. Thing is, I still know nothing about him other than the fact he's a small, shifty back with possibly the best overall speed in this class of backs. He's got good hands (Cincy used him in the slot a lot), and good power for someone his size. He looks to be a second- or third-round pick, probably going to a team with a power back.

Rams Rob Redskins Blind

The Saint Louis Rams have reportedly traded their first round pick (#2) in this year's NFL Draft to the Redskins in exchange for...




Wait for it...




Wait for it...




The Redskins 1st Round pick in 2012, 2013 AND 2014 plus the 2nd Round pick in 2012




So, the Skins trade away their future in order to get one man (RG3) and the Rams get the sixth pick in the draft. Someone seriously needs to go to DC and knock some sense into the execs' heads. Trading away three first round picks in order to get someone who probably will fizzle in the NFL? That's just not smart, especially with Peyton Manning on the market.


However, this may not be good for the Rams. They have a history of wasting good draft picks -cough-Sam Bradford-cough-

Tony Hargrove Didn't Want to Injure Brett Favre

Tony Hargrove (69) giving
Brett Favre what he deserves

Former Rams and Saints defensive end Tony Hargrove, who was a key part of the Saints' defense in 2009, has told Sports Illustrated that his late hit on Brett Favre was unpaid. In his statement to SI, Hargrove said "'...In regards to my comments that have been talked about where I say that Favre is done, I readily agree that it sounds bad in retrospect. A lot of things look bad when we look back and realize how they sound. Trust me, I've said much, much worse. Heck, I probably say worse every day. But did I personally want Favre INJURED? Absolutely and categorically NO!'" Come on, Tony. We all know that if you were the one to end Brett Favre, you'd be made a hero, especially to Jenn Sterger.

Colts Release Manning?

Apparently the Indianapolis Colts have released star quarterback Peyton Manning. This all but signals that the Colts will select Andrew Luck with the first pick in the NFL Draft next month, but is this a smart move? I say no. They're entrusting the direction the franchise in some kid from Stanford. Why release Manning? Keep Manning to be a mentor for Luck. Yes, Manning's age and his recent onset of injuries are warning signs that the 14-year vet is reaching the end of his very decorated career, but 1) he just signed a 5-year contract last year. Cutting him now means you have less money to find a suitable backup for Luck should something happen (we all know Kerry Collins is worthless) and 2) HE'S PEYTON FUCKING MANNING.

All that aside, the biggest question now is who will land the 36-year old QB? Some teams who are interested in his services include the Arizona Cardinals, Kansas City Chiefs, Tennessee Titans, Seattle Seahawks and New York Jets (What? Already giving up on Mark Sanchez?). Where will Manning fall? What does Manning's free agent status mean for Matt Flynn? (Who?)

NFL Draft Preview - QBs

There are two QBs who are already household names: Andrew Luck and Robert Griffin III. It's all but said that the Indianapolis Colts will select Luck with the first pick in this year's draft, with RG3 sure to be somewhere close behind. But aside from these two, and with USC's Matt Barkley staying in school for his senior year, who the hell else is there in the draft?


Ryan Tannehill - Texas A&M

Randy Moss... Saint?

Photo courtesy of ESPN

It's been reported that wide receiver Randy Moss will work out with the New Orleans Saints. Are the Saints serious about pursuing Moss with the turmoil in the locker room? Adding Randy Moss to that mix would be like dousing a fire with gasoline. They've got Drew Brees being a whiny little bitch about having the franchise tag slapped on him, and the Gregg the Bounty Hunter saga ongoing. I feel like the last thing the Saints need is Moss's abrasive personality.

The hits keep coming for the Saints (pun intended). Brees to stop being such a whiny little faggot and sign the tender. It's $15 million. No bonus, but still. $15 million. Only a dumbass would turn down that kind of scratch.

No new news in the Bounty Hunter saga.

Payton Supported by Owner, Gregg the Bounty Hunter Still At-Large

As we all know, the New Orleans Saints have come under fire as of late with the allegations that former defensive coordinator Gregg Williams, currently with the Saint Louis Rams, would give his defensive players bonuses for injuring opposing players. It has also been alleged that head coach Sean Payton knew of this and did nothing to stop it. According to the Associated Press, Saints owner Tom Benson supports Payton and general manager Mickey Loomis as they face these allegations despite Benson's claims of telling Loomis to stop the program.


The fan of carnage in me fully supports this, but the football fan in me wants to see justice in some form other than fines. I can understand inflicting an injury on another player to gain a competitive edge, as long as the hit was clean. As far as I know, there is no rule in the NFL that prohibits malicious hits (except head shots and hitting the quarterback too hard). However, there is legislation prohibiting non-contract incentives, which makes me wonder what the issue is about: is it the safety of players that the league has in mind, or are they simply looking to line their pockets with the money collected from fines? Readers, what are your thoughts on Nawlins' injury incentive program?